How everyone's gonna die, in a nutshell. Updated Wednesdays.

Friday, September 17, 2004

Owen Cinclair, A great carpet salesman (1982-2006)

Owen Cinclair lived in downtown Bay city for most of his life, alone. His parents died when Owen was only 12 years old. After their death he lived with his senile grandmother named Veronic Hanwacker. Veronic was a nice lady and her husband Stanley left her a toothpaste factory which she sold for 1.5 million dollars. So, Owen was taken care of for the rest of his life... or so he thought at 13. Veronic started to, how can I put this... go nuts. On top of that, Stanley was running an underground movement of sponges before his death. The FBI took all of Stanley"s remaining assets, leaving Veronic a small fund to raise Owen. Owen grew further away from Veronic and deeper into his own lonely world. When Owen was 17 he moved out of the home of Veronic. When he was leaving, she told him "put the toaster in the bagel because the birds won't swim in the apple pie if you make the sun run." Owen found a nice job managing a carpet store and found an apartment downtown on the top floor of an apartment building. One day after watching a special on the life of the armadillo, Owen decided that his life was just as meaningless as everyone else"s so he walked to his window and just jumped out. No one missed him and no one will remember him.


link | posted by Sven Byliner at 3:15 AM |


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Disclaimer: At Future Obituaries, we will shape and reshape our world however we want in order to suit our purposes. Rest assured that while not all of the people we write about are really dead, they are to us.

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